21 Sep Right Here, Right Now: What Else Is There?
A Guide To Mindfulness & Personal Wellness
What does it mean to live in the moment?
Do what we want? Give into our every impulse? Enjoy each day as though it were our last?
If you’re reading this then you’ve likely reached a stage of personal evolution in which you know that “living in the moment” isn’t about immediate gratification. To take such an approach to life is to make our lives very small and unrewarding in a way that really matters. That’s not to say we throw spontaneity out the window. Rather, we allow it to occur within a more conscious state of awareness.
So, putting aside all notions of irresponsible, impulse-driven living, what does living in the moment, aka mindfulness mean?
What Is Mindfulness?
Mindfulness is the overarching and much misunderstood term for living in the moment. And I want to pick it apart, starting with what mindfulness is not:
Mindfulness is not a relaxation technique, quick fix, or a panacea for serious psychological issues. It’s not an extra tool in your personal wellness kit, like breathwork or therapeutic massage. It falls under the umbrella of formal meditation and indeed can be a type of meditation, but it’s not limited to the zafu 20 minutes a day.
Mindfulness is also not an escape. It’s quite the opposite actually! To be mindful is to confront each moment as it is, defenses down and with openness to what is. What else can we do, after all? It’s not like we have much choice in most of what happens next (but we’ll save the free will discussion for another day!).
Unfortunately, mindfulness has become something, like Yoga, that many people pay much lip service to but rarely practice with any kind of authenticity (if we did we wouldn’t be creating so much strife in our own lives!).
Like most concepts, mindfulness is both simple and complex. But that’s because we come at it from the space of mind that likes answers and clearly defined concepts. Of course, it can be helpful to approach mindfulness as a concept, but ultimately, we must drop our ideas about what we think it is and just do it, feel it, be it.
3 Aspects Of Mindfulness
There are several layers to mindfulness and living in the moment – let’s peel them back.
One layer is the ability to notice the contents of your consciousness, that is, everything happening in your immediate environment. Your thoughts, feelings, sensations, sounds, sights – whatever shows up.
A second layer is the recognition that you are not any of those data, and simultaneously, you’re also not separate from anything that arises. You are literally the container, or the vast expanse of awareness, that holds it all.
The third aspect of mindfulness is acceptance and appreciation for the moment as it is, without wanting to change it. Of course, our innate human tendency is to want to avoid or get away from what’s unpleasant. That’s why this particular element of true presence doesn’t happen without practice. We literally have to train our minds – and
hearts – to accept things as they are. Anything else is an attempt to escape the process of living.
Now is the only thing we know for sure, and try as we might, we actually can’t be anywhere else. As Zen poet Hakuin puts it, “your coming and going is nowhere but where you are.”
How To “Do” Mindfulness
There are two ways of approaching the here and now, or mindfulness: by dropping far enough back from the moment as so to engage an expansive view of it, or by going deep into its subtleties. Either way, you arrive at the same place, and it’s completely without prescription or roadmap. We must practice, experiment, and notice.
So how do you even begin a mindfulness practice or approach to life?
One method that most people find very accessible is paying attention to the breath and noting what happens in the body. For example, you may mentally note the words rising, falling with each inhalation and exhalation (or use any terms that come naturally to you).
Noting serves to anchor you to the action and helps prevent any attempts to control the breath. You are simply noticing it as it happens, whether it’s shallow, deep, resistricted, or otherwise, without judgement.
You may also just observe the breath anywhere in the body that it’s most apparent (eg. through the nostrils) without noting it.
Another method is to simply pause at moments of transition: when getting up from your desk to use the washroom, reaching for your phone, or generally switching tasks. Allow 10-15 minutes of total silence and stillness and just notice yourself and your environment. If you find this difficult, you’re not alone, and your breath can be a useful anchor.
How Does Mindfulness Support Personal Wellness?
Mindfulness helps us become acquainted with the nature of our own minds. How it spins off into the twilight zone at times or finds escape in pleasant daydreams. Mindfulness shows us our mental patterns so we can learn to train the mind back to the present moment with gentle, non-judgemental awareness.
It also helps us see life more clearly, and what could be better than that? That means we stop missing out on what’s happening in the here and now because we’re no longer lost in la-la-land. It means we can participate fully in our lives.
Mindfulness helps us show up better in our relationships, to be more present with our work, and to enjoy the big wonder inside the small things we may otherwise miss in our haste to do something or go somewhere.
As Ram Dass suggests, mindfulness encourages us to quiet the mind, open the heart, and deal with the suffering right in front of us.
Keep in mind that mindfulness is a process, not to be perfected or controlled. If you find yourself trying to force it, notice that and instead apply a gentler effort.
If you live in the Durham, Clarington, or Bowmanville region and you’re interested in learning more about mindfulness, living in the present, and generally taking a more conscious approach to life, I’d love to meet with you. Feel free to contact me to schedule a consultation or just have a chat. I look forward to hearing from you.